There is no simple way of saying this – other than saying it. When you’re a teenage boy, you’re going to be mostly terrible at relating to teenage girls.
Women, ladies and girls are not there for your gratification, objectification or vilification. They don’t exist as a measure of your masculinity, virility or technical ability.
Put teenage boys (or any group of men for that matter) in a group and the machismo, chest-beating and dick-waving starts. Rather than learning about it from an older, wiser example, instead teenage boys rely on each other.
Not the best source of information.
Male-posturing might have its place, but humans became great because of our ability to share and cooperate – not compete.
So you teenage boys – forget about ‘getting off the mark’. The key to finding, creating and maintaining a wonderful relationship in your future is to focus on maintaining the wonderful relationships you have with the women in your life – and that’s not just your mothers. They will teach you everything you need to know if you shut up and listen every once in a while.
No – we don’t expect you to do that all the time – but everything you need, you can get from your family and extended family.
And teachers you choose to trust of course…
I keep coming back to the words of the late great MCA of the Beastie Boys. He said it best on the track ‘Sure Shot’:
I want to say a little something that’s long overdue / the disrespect to women has got to be through / To all the mothers and the sisters and the wives and friends / I wanna offer my love and respect till the end
This is not a sprint or marathon. It’s a lifelong journey of learning and uncovering the mystery, wonder and profundity of women and relating to them.